User blog:TotalDramaFan1000/TDF's review HAHAHA
Hello, Terry here with another Review to View and I want to take you back to the early 90's just when animation was beginning to become kick ass again. This was mostly due to the success of the 1988 film "Who Framed Roger Rabbit", but of course when one studio has a big success another one is going to try and copy and that leads me into the 1992 live action/animated film Cool World. I mean your probably wondering how bad it could possibly be, it is just some animated fun, right? Well lets hear the premise, a cartoon wants to have sex with her creator so she can become a real person .............Whaaaaaaaaaa!?! Alright, before we get into this sucker a little background to the production. The film was original pitched to Paramount Pictures as an R-Rated horror film by director Ralph Bakshi, known for his films "Fritz the Cat", "Wizards" and the animated "Lord of the Rings" film. The premise for the original was an underground comic book artist has sex with his creation and the creation would later conceived a half human-half cartoon chid who is labelled a freak, so he sets out to kill his father. The concept still kind of sounds a bit silly, but the mix between live action and animation on the child would have been pretty badass. Paramount bought the film and everything was looking good, until the producer of the film, Frank Mancuso, Jr. decided to have the film completely rewritten behind Bakshi back and threaten to sue Bakshi if he didn't direct it. So we have a shitty written script and a director directing something he thinks is complete shit, still think this movie is going to be good? Well lets take a look..... So our story stars in 1945 in Las Vegas, where Frank Harris, who is played by .......Brad Pitt? What are you doing her-- Oh this is pre-oscar nominated Brad Pitt, alright you can be here. Alright so Harris is returning from World Word II and is greeted by his mother. The two later take a ride on a motorcycle, but a drunken couple crash into him and his mother and she is killed on impact. As he waits to be taken to a hospital by an ambulance he is suddenly transported to Cool World, a weird place inhabited by cartoon creatures called "Doodles". Harris was transported to Cool World by Dr. Whiskers by mistake, as he was trying to transport himself to the real world. Whiskers appoints Harris as a police officer in Cool World to keep order in the crazy world. Alright, so far the movie has only been boring, but now shit is about to get fucking stupid. We flash forward to 1992 where we are introduced to our "hero" Jack Deebs, played by Gabriel Byrne (not feeling very proud about being Irish right now) who is a cartoonist who created a popular comic book called "Cool World". He is in jail because he killed a guy who he found in bed with his wife, well that seems fairly important to the story, do we ever find out what happened to his wife? Of course not! We have cartoon boobies to see. Alright so while drawing in his pri because you're apprantly allowed to turn your cell into an art studio he fawns over one of the characters of Cool World, Holli Would. When suddenly he is zapped into Cool World suddenly by Holli Would, who is played by Kim Basinger. Now to the credit of Bakshi, he did put a lot of effort into the animation of the background art, but the cartoons animated are pretty lame. So anyway, Deebs sees Holli dancing and reaches out to her and........Thats it, she zaps him back after that. The point of that scene? I don't know, to show Holli dancing to turn on the three perverts watching this movie that actually think she is hot. So anyway we are introduced to a purple doodle wearing a suite. Ooooh he looks scary, he must be our antagonist! Oh wait no, he serves little or no purpose to the plot.......The point!? Oh yeah and after watching this much of the film you will have begin to realize: COOL WORLD IS FUCKING CRAZY. There is never a second in this place where doodle isn't running across the screen or doing something stupid in the background! Even when characters are talking we have cartoons hitting each other with mallets! It makes it hard to hear the characters, but thats okay you aren't missing much....... So anyway Harris, who hasn't aged at all in the last 35 years for some strange reason comes to confront Holli about bringing Deebs to Cool World as humans (called Noids in Cool World) are banned....for some reason. Holli reveals that she brought Jack there so she could sleep with him because that will transport her into a real person....for some reason and she can cross over into the real world. But Harris stops her because it is bad.....for some reason. I don't know! Anyway, back in the real world Deebs is being release from prison and heads home, but is having trouble adjusting back into normal society. He is then transported back to Cool World again where he is greeted by Holli. The interactions between Holli and Deebs in this scene also show how bad the animation/live action scenes really are in this film, I mean after Roger Rabbit this stuff should not be challenging to do AT ALL. So then in another pointless scene Holli and Deebs are chased by cops because......THEY CAN? But at least we see some pretty cool background art while they are being chased. While this goes on Harris meets up with his doodle girlfriend Lonette, who you might think is kind of hot until you find out she is voiced by the same person who voiced Cheese of "Fosters Home for Imaginary Friends".....creepy. Lonette wants to have sex with Harris but he won't let her because doodles and noids aren't allowed to have sex.....for some reason! Soon his partner Nails the Spider shows up and tells him about Holli and they both head out to confront her. Deebs and Holli head to a dance club where Deebs is confronted by Harris. Harris warns Deebs to stay away from Holli, saying she is only using him so she can become real. Holli then zaps Harris back to the real world.......FOR SOME REASON! This movie seriously makes no sense, the rules of Cool World make no sense, the characters are idiots and the subject of the movie is really, really, REALLY uncomfortable. Ugh, sorry about the mini rant, moving on. The next night Deebs is zapped back to Cool World, for the LAST TIME, thank God. The next scene also happens to be one of the most awkward scenes I have ever seen in my life, Deebs and Holli having sex.....I think i'll just skip that part. Anyway Holli is transformed into a real person and her and Deebs head back to the real world. Harris and Nails get news of this from.....Purple doodle suit guy! Hey you did serve a purpose! Anyway back in the real world Deebs and Holli go out for dinner in the real world, where Deebs sees that Holli has more interest in other men then him when she begins to sing with.....Frank Sinatra, Jr.? What the hell is with this....Oh wait! I forgot to bitch about Kim Basinger's constant interference with this film! See during the production of this film Basinger pushed A LOT of people around and making a lot of demands. She also made a lot of changes to the script herself adding in this scene because she wanted to sing a duet with Sinatra, Jr. Also, half way through production of the film she wanted the script rewritten so she could show it to kids in hospital. Okay, that is nice and all but you are in the MIDDLE of filming a movie about a human and cartoon having sex, I think it is a bit late to rewrite the movie for kids. Anyway, Deebs and Holli begin to change between human and cartoon, which must be a side effect from having sex with each other. Holli then goes to look for a "Spike of Power" that was put there by a doodle that crossed over to the real world before.....Okay, this movie has too many things that make NO SENSE. I am wrapping it up NOW. Harris and Deebs team up to stop Holli. Holli meets up with Dr. Whiskers who has been living in the real world and he tells her the Spike is on top of a tall casino, but warns her it will do her no good. Harris tries to stop Holli but he is pushed off by her and falls to his death. Deebs then tries to stop Holli because according to Whiskers it is his "destiny". And then the Spike creates a portal between the two worlds.......After that I can't describe to you what happens, you are going to have to watch it for yourself, all the people in L.A. are transformed into doodles and some doodles cross over into the real world, I know that doesn't sound crazy but you just have to see it to believe. Anyway, Deebs closes the portal and saves everyone in L.A., but also traps himself and Holli in Cool World in the process. Back in Cool World Lonette discovers that Harris is dead and Nails has brought back his body to show her. But Harris is brought back to life because when a doodle is killed by a noid he is reborn a doodle......SURE WHY FUCKING NOT? The movie ends with Deebs (Who is now a doodle) planning to marry Holli, much to her dismay. Cause ya know he still wants her even though he realized she was only using him like thirty minutes ago. Whenever I hear of people talking about producers meddling with movies I will always think about this movie. I do not blame Bakshi for any of this shit, I blame the producers and Kim Basinger who just took over the film. Besides some cool background art and some decent acting from Brad Pitt and some of the voice actors this movie is horrible and one of the worst I have seen. I'd only advise watching this if you want to torture yourself or for the scene when the two worlds cross over, just for home fucking crazy it was. Thats all for this time, Terry signing out. Category:Blog posts Category:Blog posts